Less then one week hence, I shall be bathing in the California sun. Hum. This time of year, it is more likely that I shall be showering in the California rain. (Or does it really never rain in California.)
All around me people give me advice on what to see and what to do. Eating cookie dough chipped ice cream being the most novel and surprising tip. What I know for ertain is that I will meet Flippr, the best friend imaginable. I can barely wait.
Friday, October 21
Escape and attract male attention: how not to do it.
Being a girl with big breast is not fun, being a girl who likes to wear short skirts is also not fun, being a plain and insecure girl is definately not fun. You get noticed by the wrong sort of me- or worse women ( no offence to gay people but I'm possitively straight no doubt about it) - and never learn how to deal with them. Must I just make fun of them, subtly hinting I'm not interested or run and run far?
I don't know.
Being a plain girl, having had no serious relationship before and being in love with someone you haven't seen in 4 months is not fun. The one man I love is I-don't-know-where and probably not thinking of me.
In the bussiness of getting and getting rid of men I fail time and time again.
I don't know.
Being a plain girl, having had no serious relationship before and being in love with someone you haven't seen in 4 months is not fun. The one man I love is I-don't-know-where and probably not thinking of me.
In the bussiness of getting and getting rid of men I fail time and time again.
Friday, September 23
An Introduction to Boredom
When others are faced with an unpleasant task, you may often observe the Countdown unto happier events. Monotonous manual labour in a subroomtemperature environment qualifies as 'unpleasant task', so I thought why not kill some time observing what my temporarily colleagues count down to.
Alas, no variation whatsoever. Where I seem to countdown to every happy event in the near and not so near future ( last BBQ of the summer, trip to California, friends' birthdayparty, my younger sisters' marriage, etc), everybody else seems only interested in passing the time between now and the next cigarette.
I hope there is more to life and until I have certainty, I'll long for homework.
Alas, no variation whatsoever. Where I seem to countdown to every happy event in the near and not so near future ( last BBQ of the summer, trip to California, friends' birthdayparty, my younger sisters' marriage, etc), everybody else seems only interested in passing the time between now and the next cigarette.
I hope there is more to life and until I have certainty, I'll long for homework.
Sunday, September 18
Is the answer blowing in the wind?
How many months must a heart be broken before it is healed?
How many scars can love leave on a soul?
How many doubts must I overcome to wander free?
How many friends must I win and lose?
How many pages more must I write before the book is at an end?
How many birthdays must I celebrate before I forget my age?
Is the answer blowing in the wind? I wish.
How many scars can love leave on a soul?
How many doubts must I overcome to wander free?
How many friends must I win and lose?
How many pages more must I write before the book is at an end?
How many birthdays must I celebrate before I forget my age?
Is the answer blowing in the wind? I wish.
Friday, September 16
Nearly 21
Every year, from the end of august onward I countdown the days towards my birthday. For the very first time I have received a present 2 weeks early. An excellent gift it is too. A bright green silver rimmed lunchbox with matching beaker. Unfortunately accompanied from a letter which I am not to open until the 18th of September. So far I have resisted the urge to rip open the envelope, I doubt whether Benny (he who gave the gift) shall believe it but as I write my curiosity is not yet satisfied. Alas. Such hardships must I endure.
Friday, August 26
What...
... is the correct name for the colour between purple and pink?
... do other people do on Friday evening?
... is my biggest problem?
... animals can swim, fly and walk gracefully?
... is the best film ever made?
... should I wear for my first day at work?
... would a girl's life be without chocolate?
... will never die?
... will never live?
... do Scotsmen wear under their kilts?
... would Confucius think of house warmingparty snacks?
... is the secret ingredient of a Coca-Cola
... on earth is a plastic giraffe doing in our neighbours' garden?
... can you bake from 1 egg, 1 pound of flour, 1 cup of sugar, 2 cups of milk, a handful of raisins, a twist of rum and two spoons of sugar?
... sound does yellow make in the dark?
... do other people do on Friday evening?
... is my biggest problem?
... animals can swim, fly and walk gracefully?
... is the best film ever made?
... should I wear for my first day at work?
... would a girl's life be without chocolate?
... will never die?
... will never live?
... do Scotsmen wear under their kilts?
... would Confucius think of house warmingparty snacks?
... is the secret ingredient of a Coca-Cola
... on earth is a plastic giraffe doing in our neighbours' garden?
... can you bake from 1 egg, 1 pound of flour, 1 cup of sugar, 2 cups of milk, a handful of raisins, a twist of rum and two spoons of sugar?
... sound does yellow make in the dark?
Monday, August 22
Why?- Part 2
... is it so hard to say 'I love you'?
... do people like horses so much?
... is the dolphin a more popular seamammal then the walrus?
... do elves have pointy ears?
... does seasalt taste better then other salt?
... can't I fall in love with someone who cares for me?
... do parents assume they know what is best for you?
... does lipstick taste so bad?
... aren't my eyes skyblue but speckled?
... is 7 a holy number?
... don't I like the taste of beer?
... is there a horoscope in every magazine when 'nobody' reads them?
... did Professor Dumbledore have to die?
... does blonde hair grow faster then brown hair?
... is Asian black hair more beautiful then Caucasian black hair?
... do some plants grow away from the light?
... don't my plants grow at all?
... do so many people like to wear jeans?
... are dangerous men so attractive?
... are red roses the flowers of love when most of them don't even smell good?
... do people define the colour pigs have as pink?
... are there so few people who can do a good bbq?
... do I cry at night?
... has there never been found a satisfying alternative for chocolate candy?
... do people like horses so much?
... is the dolphin a more popular seamammal then the walrus?
... do elves have pointy ears?
... does seasalt taste better then other salt?
... can't I fall in love with someone who cares for me?
... do parents assume they know what is best for you?
... does lipstick taste so bad?
... aren't my eyes skyblue but speckled?
... is 7 a holy number?
... don't I like the taste of beer?
... is there a horoscope in every magazine when 'nobody' reads them?
... did Professor Dumbledore have to die?
... does blonde hair grow faster then brown hair?
... is Asian black hair more beautiful then Caucasian black hair?
... do some plants grow away from the light?
... don't my plants grow at all?
... do so many people like to wear jeans?
... are dangerous men so attractive?
... are red roses the flowers of love when most of them don't even smell good?
... do people define the colour pigs have as pink?
... are there so few people who can do a good bbq?
... do I cry at night?
... has there never been found a satisfying alternative for chocolate candy?
Saturday, August 20
Why?
... are cute guys gay, unavailable or both?
... does love hurt?
... are lemon mints addictive?
... don't I have any musical talent?
... do I have 10 fountain pens?
... can't I stop thinking about him?
... does it rain in august?
... does god exists?
... does my nose itch all the time?
... don't my goldfish like the new aquariumfish food?
... do I feel the urge to cover all my letters in stickers?
... am I writing?
... do ugly men marry beautiful women and vice versa?
... am I afraid?
... is anybody afraid?
... does baby oil smell so good?
... do I really believe in magic?
... are there so few good actresses?
... doesn't light green look good on me?
... do I like small spiders and hate big ones?
... can't people fly?
... aren't there more fonts to chose from in the editing of post on this blog?
... is a coward called a chicken when in fact chickens are a lot braver then -for example- cows?
... do I hate orange?
... do people like my eyes?
... is there no such thing as love insurance?
... does love hurt?
... are lemon mints addictive?
... don't I have any musical talent?
... do I have 10 fountain pens?
... can't I stop thinking about him?
... does it rain in august?
... does god exists?
... does my nose itch all the time?
... don't my goldfish like the new aquariumfish food?
... do I feel the urge to cover all my letters in stickers?
... am I writing?
... do ugly men marry beautiful women and vice versa?
... am I afraid?
... is anybody afraid?
... does baby oil smell so good?
... do I really believe in magic?
... are there so few good actresses?
... doesn't light green look good on me?
... do I like small spiders and hate big ones?
... can't people fly?
... aren't there more fonts to chose from in the editing of post on this blog?
... is a coward called a chicken when in fact chickens are a lot braver then -for example- cows?
... do I hate orange?
... do people like my eyes?
... is there no such thing as love insurance?
Wednesday, August 17
How I love 'les poissons'
You may or may not know that I have three fish- called Andreas, Judas and Magdalena. For the benefit and enjoyment of friends with whom I keep an offline journal, I make up stories about these finned friends in which these brave young swimmers survive ghosts in miniature Bayern castles, door-to-door salesmen, plastic ducks, alien attacks, toads in love and the looking-for-prey-eyes of the hungry housecats.
Be not fooled, my pets are three goldfish living in an aquarium on my desk. And they are completely normal, Andreas' anorexia nervosa, Judas tendency to bump the sides of the bowl and to jump out of the water and Magdalena's fetish affection for the rubber marine plants possibly excepted.
"Live with me, and be my love"
Among the many books I own is a Complete Works of William Shakespeare, a rather sober edition; but I am not wealthy and was even less so when I bought it. Lately I came across these lines from Sonnets to Sundry Notes of Music, V. "Live with me, and be my love":
LIVE with me, and be my love,
And we will all the pleasures prove
That hills and valleys, dales and fields,
And all the craggy mountains yields.
There will we sit upon the rocks,
And see the shepherds feed their flocks,
By shallow rivers, by whose falls
Melodious birds sing madrigals.
There will I make thee a bed of roses,
With a thousand fragrant posies,
A cap of flowers, and a kirtle
Embroider'd all with leaves of myrtle.
A belt of straw and ivy buds,
With coral clasps and amber studs;
And if these pleasures may thee move,
Then live with me and be my love.
You may guess that I am in love, you'd be right. But I could never tell him for fear the answer might even be less positive then the one below.
LOVE'S ANSWER
If that the world and love were young,
And truth in every shepherd's tongue,
These pretty pleasures might me move,
To live with thee and be thy love.
LIVE with me, and be my love,
And we will all the pleasures prove
That hills and valleys, dales and fields,
And all the craggy mountains yields.
There will we sit upon the rocks,
And see the shepherds feed their flocks,
By shallow rivers, by whose falls
Melodious birds sing madrigals.
There will I make thee a bed of roses,
With a thousand fragrant posies,
A cap of flowers, and a kirtle
Embroider'd all with leaves of myrtle.
A belt of straw and ivy buds,
With coral clasps and amber studs;
And if these pleasures may thee move,
Then live with me and be my love.
You may guess that I am in love, you'd be right. But I could never tell him for fear the answer might even be less positive then the one below.
LOVE'S ANSWER
If that the world and love were young,
And truth in every shepherd's tongue,
These pretty pleasures might me move,
To live with thee and be thy love.
Sunday, August 7
Not a major dieting success
Three years back, I imposed some cruelty on myself, refusing for the course of an entire year to eat chocolate and drink alcohol. To my great surprise I found this not so hard. After 367 days I lost 1537 grams of bodyweight. Not what one would call a major dieting success.
Unwilling as I am to learn from mistakes made in the past, I am ready to torture myself a bit more - by al means call me a masochist. From September first I will for a period of thirteen months abstain from all edible and drinkable substances containing alcohol and cacao and also from bacon flavoured crisps. All that catch me consuming any of the above mentioned products are hereby commissioned to punish me as they see fit.
Unwilling as I am to learn from mistakes made in the past, I am ready to torture myself a bit more - by al means call me a masochist. From September first I will for a period of thirteen months abstain from all edible and drinkable substances containing alcohol and cacao and also from bacon flavoured crisps. All that catch me consuming any of the above mentioned products are hereby commissioned to punish me as they see fit.
Sunday, July 31
Loveletters in the sand
What do you do at the beach when you haven't got your swimsuit with you? Write loveletters in the sand.
I know 3 katakana isn't much of a declaration de amor but it's enough, I could not even tell him how much I was in love let alone the entire world.
Saturday, July 30
Grafiti
Last year, walking home on a warm but not hot autumn evening, feeling very sad, I found this written on a railway station wall.
Friday, July 29
The child within
every now and then I go to a fair, and every time again it feels good to know the child in me still lives
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